Motherly Love

It’s nearly 6 a.m. and I’m slowly waking up to the tiny coo’s coming from the little person I brought into my bed when she woke up in the middle of the night. I open one eye and try to shove a binky in her mouth, hoping that she will immediately go right back to sleep. “Come on”, I think “just give me another hour.” Sometimes it works and sometimes I have to accept whatever amount of sleep I got and hope to catch a nap later in the day (but I don’t count on it). As unhappy as I am about having to wake up before my body wants me to, I can’t help but smile when I turn my head and see the sweetest little grin- consisting only of two bottom teeth.

The day starts with a feeding and a diaper change for her and a large iced coffee for me- you know, the essentials. As she sits up on her play mat she examines her many toys with her eyes, hands, and mouth. I spend about 10 minutes playing with her before I look around and make a mental list of all the things that need to get done around the house. And then something else catches my attention and I wish I had written that list down on paper.

When I start thinking about my week I realize that I have no idea what day it even is. So I yell out to the only other person in the house who can talk back, “Alexa, what’s the date today?”. She gives me the 411 and when it’s a Friday, a little piece of me dies as I think back to the days when a Friday was always something to look forward to.

I love my daughter more than I ever thought I could love another person, but being alone with her all the time can be- I’m just gonna say it… boring as hell. Saying this makes me feel bad. I look at how big she’s gotten and I can’t believe that what the millions of strangers have told me is actually true. “It goes by so fast!” Ugh I hate when the strangers are right.

It does go by so fast. Suddenly she won’t let me hold her a certain way, so I adjust to her needs without realizing that I’ll never hold her the same way again. I mean, I could but she’s bigger now and it’s not the same. Some days may be boring, but they are also filled with moments of pure happiness and amazement at the little person my baby is becoming. It also doesn’t hurt to have cool neighbors and friends that keep me sane.

At the end of the day, when we’re both in our beds, I go to sleep knowing that I will be woken up in a few hours. I know that I will have to get up, go into her room, and lift her out of her crib to bring her into my bed because I’m too dang tired to do it again. I go to bed knowing all of this and being totally okay with it because I also go to bed knowing that I’ll wake up to the sweetest little two-toothed grin.

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Motivation Monday #65

This is the last Monday of October and I’m pleased to say that the weather finally matches the month. After last week’s strange heat wave I am absolutely loving this gloomy 67 degree day.

Anyway, if I’m being honest I have no absolutely no motivation today. Somehow I actually got out of bed this morning and made it to my cleaning job regardless of the fact that I got a total of 4 hours of sleep last night.

For the last couple of weeks, my sleep schedule has been totally out of wack. First it was because I had to get Tilly spayed, it was seriously a nightmare for a couple weeks. I felt like I was potty training again as she was having multiple accidents in the house. The medication she was on was causing her to lose control of her bladder and I was doing heaps of laundry that smelled like pee every day. This week she’s still waking up 2-3 times a night to go to the bathroom but at least she is waking me up to go outside. I end up getting up to take her out and then I can’t fall back asleep because I am super uncomfortable. I naively didn’t think that my pregnancy would come to this point but it is finally starting to get to me.

My back has been really bothering me the past few days and although just one more month seems like no big deal compared to the other 8 that have already passed, it now seems like an eternity if I’m going to be feeling this miserable the whole time.

I’ll make it through though, especially since Blake will be home in a couple weeks and I’m sure he’ll be ecstatic to give me back massages. hehe.

So, I’m sorry I’m not more motivational today but I guess the message here is that if I can get up at 9 months pregnant after only 4 hours of sleep and go scrub toilets, you can do whatever it is you have to do too!

Have a good week and a Happy Halloween tomorrow!!

Motivation Monday #64

It’s the second to last Monday of October and it looks like were having bit of a heat wave this week. Thankfully, it should cool down by next week. The heat can make it difficult to want to get anything done but with Halloween only a week and one day away, at least there’s something to look forward to. For me, that will be all the leftover candy.

Today I plan to practice mindfulness. This word seems to have come up a lot since I’ve been pregnant, it is helpful during labor and delivery. But I think it’s something we should practice every day regardless of whether we’re pregnant or not.

To be mindful is to be conscious or aware of the present moment while calmly acknowledging and accepting your feelings, thoughts, and bodily sensations. It is used as a form of therapy to help you forget your anxieties and worries and just focus on the present. Life can be overwhelming at times, it’s important to regain control of what’s going on in your headspace. Taking some time to practice mindfulness can help to create space between us and our reactions or conditioned responses.

Set aside some time today to observe the present moment as it is, let your judgements pass, if your mind wanders, bring it back to the moment you are in and just feel present.

Hopefully, with a clear mind you will be able to get through the day a little bit more smoothly than you would if your thought process were clogged with tons of other worries. If you are holding onto things because you feel they are important to remember, then write them down on a piece of paper and free your mind of that clutter.

I hope everyone has a beautiful week and try to stay cool out there!

Motivation Monday #62

I know it’s only September, but I’ve decided to get started on my new years resolutions early. One of the things I really want to do is get back on top of my blogging. I know that I don’t have a huge following, it’s mostly friends and family who read my posts. I love doing it though, and appreciate anyone who takes the time to see what I’m writing about. I started losing focus when we moved back to California, in North Carolina I had all the time in the world to come up with different ideas and subjects to write about. Ironically enough, I lost motivation and started mainly only posting these Motivation Monday blogs because it was easier. I just didn’t have the creative energy to think of new recipes or DIY projects.

Well, I have decided to challenge myself to do better. My first resolution is to come up with new writing topics. Because it may not be a new year yet, but it’s never too early to make improvements. Plus I’m sure I’ll have a whole new list of things that I can do better by the end of the year- there’s always something that can use a little improving. I know that if I set my mind to something and hold myself accountable- even if it’s not necessarily something that needs to be done- I will make sure that I do it.

My next goal is to post some dinner ideas on cooking for one. I’ve been struggling with cooking excessive amounts of food and eating out a lot more since I’m all alone now. I know I can’t be the only one who has a hard time with this, so I’ll try to come up with some good recipes to help others while helping myself. Any recommendations or things that you would like to read about- please feel free to send them my way 🙂

I hope you all have some resolutions that you can get started on too. Have a happy Monday and a productive week!

 

 

Motivation Monday #59

Is it Monday again already? Time seems to be flying for me lately. Maybe it’s because I’m so focused on baby stuff, I spent a whole day last week rearranging rooms and setting up baby girls nursery. It’s definitely making things feel more real and getting me very excited. My belly is finally starting to look like there actually may be a baby in there so I’m more comfortable wearing tight clothes again which is so nice because picking an outfit had been a major struggle for the last three months. But that’s enough pregnancy talk.

Today I’ll be focusing on getting a project finished for my online class, then I’ll have three finals to take and I’m done with my first semester! I’m really liking this online school thing, it can be pretty challenging at times because I do like to have an actual teacher giving me a lesson. I’ve had to learn to be very self-disciplined and I’ve been pretty successful at it so far. I like that I can take my tests before they’re due and I don’t have super strict deadlines because I can make it work with my schedule. Say I’m going out of town for the weekend and I have a test on Friday, I’ll usually take it on Monday to get it out of the way and not have to worry about it after that.

You may have things to get done today too, try practicing that self-discipline and finish your tasks right away so that you don’t have to worry about doing them later in the day or week. When it comes to school work I have definitely been known to procrastinate in the past, but the feeling of completing something and not having it linger on my mind is a great one!

Have a lovely week and start checking things off of your to-do list, I promise you’ll feel great once you do!

Motivation Monday #57

Good morning and happy Monday!

Monday’s are the beginning of each new week, we get to start something new or focus on getting closer to a goal that we have already begun.

Lately my Mondays are the beginning of each new week of pregnancy. Today marks the 18 week point. My friend pointed out that I’m almost halfway through and that is pretty crazy. My belly is definitely growing but at this point it just looks like I’ve given up on my health, basically it looks more like a beer belly than a baby belly. It’s so frustrating getting dressed and not fitting into my clothes the same way anymore. Everyone will try to comfort me and say “You’re not fat, you’re pregnant!” and to that I say, “I know! But right now I don’t look pregnant, I just look fat!”. So there’s that.

According to my pregnancy app, our baby is currently the size of a bell pepper, about 5 1/2 inches long and weights about 7 ounces. We get to find out whether we’re having  boy or a girl in a couple of weeks and that’s definitely something to look forward to.

Speaking of things to look forward to, I’ll get back to the point of this post and remind you that there is always something to look forward to. If you need a little extra motivation this Monday, just remember it’s not forever. You’ll get through today and the weekend will be back before you know it. You may have a birthday to look forward to or some other event that will get you out of the house and bring you closer to friends and family. Work hard today so that you can enjoy those days off even more.

Have a lovely week!

Motivation Monday #56 

If I’m being honest, I’m having a hard time getting up off the couch this morning. I tried to plan my day out yesterday in order to prevent this from happening but here I am again…ready to go back to sleep.

But I really do want to be productive today! I especially want to workout because this whole pregnancy thing is causing me to eat very poorly. So what can I say to motivate myself to get up off the couch, get dressed, and go to the gym?

Well, yesterday I was feeling very… not myself. It seems as though pregnancy will do that to a person. I am so forgetful and I feel like there are 20 things I need to remember to do but I have no idea what they are, it’s a very unnerving feeling. So last night, I took a bath and read a book. It was a great way to come back to the moment and be present in it. I was able to take my mind off of all other things and think about what I need to do right now. So after my bath I did something else that I love to do, I made a list!

With a clear mind I was able to jot down about 10 things that I need to do today, some of which I have been meaning to do for a while. I felt great after I got it all down on paper and I went to bed feeling like I would definitely conquer this Monday. But apparently it’s easy to lose focus because here I am on the couch again, refusing to move. Luckily, I have the whole day ahead of me and I have just crossed on thing off my list- this post!

So if you’re struggling to get going this Monday, try to take a moment to think about what is most important to you today. Think about how accomplished you will feel once you take care of whatever it is that’s has been lingering on your to-do list. Do what you need to do and clear your mind of that clutter. I hope everyone has a lovely Monday and a fantastic week 🙂

Motivation Monday #55

Happy Monday!

This month is almost over and June is on it’s way which means summer is just around the corner. A lot of people will be graduating in June and moving on to the next chapter of their lives. How exciting!

That’s pretty much what life is right? We accomplish things so that we can move on to our next goal in life. The important thing to remember is to enjoy the journey.

So today I’ll share this quote to remind you to do exactly that:

“Don’t wait for everything to be perfect before you decide to enjoy your life.”

Life wont ever be perfect 100% of the time. It’s important to enjoy every moment you can because you’re sure to have more difficult times regardless of how hard you try to stay away form them. Enjoy life, enjoy this Monday and keep moving along 🙂

Motivation Monday #53

You thought I forgot it was Monday huh? Well you’re not wrong… I forgot for about half the day and then when I remembered, I kept forgetting to post my Motivation Monday.

Well better late than never, it may be the end of the day but there’s still four days left in the week for which you may need a little motivating- So here goes!

As I mentioned briefly in a previous post, I’ve been trying to get back into going to church and I have finally found a place that feels like a good fit for me. On top of that I’ve been attending a women’s bible study and we’re currently reading a book titled “Uninvited” by Lysa TerKeurst. There are a lot of great verses tucked in the pages of this book. I’ll share one with you tonight that stood out to me as I read today.

“Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?” Matthew 6:26-27 NIV

I read this and immediately thought about how much time I spend worrying about things that I don’t always have complete control over. The birds getting the food they need to survive is an example of how God will always take care of us. There may be struggles and it may seem unfair at times. But we always learn from the more difficult times in our lives. There’s no point in worrying because our lives are already planed out for us- what we think is our purpose can change at the drop of a hat. Live life and cherish the good times, try not to stress about the rest.

 

HAVE A FANTASTIC WEEK! And to all the mommas out there, I hope you feel extra loved this Sunday 🙂

Motivation Monday #50

Happy 50th Motivation Monday! I hope everyone had a relaxing Easter weekend spent with loved ones.

Easter is a great holiday for a few reasons. First of all, it’s the beginning of Spring and the weather is always perfect. Second, there are lot’s of jellybeans and chocolate bunnies involved. And last but absolutely not least, it’s a great reminder that our time here is not permanent.

Jesus died so that we may continue to live beyond this life. Even if you aren’t Christian, or don’t believe in God, you can’t deny that our time here is only temporary. We are all leaving this earth at some point, so shouldn’t we make our days on this planet count?

To me that means doing good things and attempting to make the world a better place for future generations. So I’ve come up with a list of things that you may be able to do in order to make a difference.

  • Start a community garden
  • Ride your bicycle if it’s an option
  • Teach your children to have manners and care for others
  • Recycle and find ways to cut down on your usage of plastic
  • Stop buying products with questionable ingredients in them, especially if it’s something you’re consuming or putting on your body
  • Plant flowers that bee’s can use to collect pollen
  • Volunteer with an organization that you like or make donations
  • Spend less time on your phone and computer and watch less TV

 

These things seem simple but I know that it can take some convincing. In fact, I’m even trying to convince myself to do some of these things. If we are all just a little more mindful of the things we do/buy/say on a daily basis, we will become more aware of what we should really be doing.

Just because were not going to be here forever doesn’t mean we shouldn’t take care of our home for now, in fact it’s all the more reason to do so because we don’t want to leave our grandchildren to suffer on a rotten planet.

Have a beautiful week and stay motivated!